Fermata 20 May 2022: Being Still and Fearing Less
Contemplative Outreach and Fearless Dialogues
Fermata is the weekly newsletter describing some of the past week’s highlights from Notes of Rest, which is my spiritual retreat ministry that interweaves text, music, and questions for the sake of cultivating stillness, introspection, and creativity in communities so that all may rest. I'd love to host a Notes of Rest for your church, seminary, or affinity group. Feel free to reply to this email to start the conversation!
Sessions to Come:
Notes of Rest at First United Methodist Church of Oak Park (May 22, 10a Central, 324 N Oak Park Ave, Oak Park, IL)
Notes of Rest at North Shore United Methodist Church (June 5, 10a Central, 213 Hazel Avenue, Glencoe, IL 60022)
Hi everyone,
This past week I had the joy of hosting two sessions, one for the prayer organization Contemplative Outreach and one for the grassroots organization I work for Fearless Dialogues. Taken together, I was reminded of two important truths: being still grows our capacity to rest but fear shrinks it.
At the start of the Contemplative Outreach session last Saturday, we sat in centering prayer for 20 - 25 minutes. Centering prayer is akin to meditation, with the added step of focusing one’s attention on a word that opens you up to the divine presence. I was amazed at the power of adding this centering prayer step at the beginning of the session. Taking this time to sit still for so long and just being able to focus on my breath and God calmed my body so much so that I almost had a hard time getting us started with the normal content afterwards! My muscles were so relaxed, my mind so at rest. It’s funny: even though I talk a great deal about stillness in Notes of Rest and practice centering prayer in my morning routine, starting the session that way was novel for me.
The calm I felt starting that way was a reminder to me of how much I can grow in practicing what I preach. Can we move through our days free of enough hurry such that we have a moment to “center down” (Howard Thurman) before our next appointment? What voluntary hurry can we cut out?
To that end, I am reminded of my recent read: The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry by John Mark Comer. This pastor argues that we are defined by hurry in modernity but don’t have to be; we can instead choose spiritual disciplines that resist hurry and redefine us (Sabbath, simplicity, silence and solitude, and slowing). The book was an awesome challenge to me because I realized that for far too much of my life I’ve enjoyed and even been proud of “hurry sickness,” constantly being on the go and running from place to place - even into Notes of Rest sessions! I confess this to you to speak to the fact that Notes of Rest was established because I need the teachings as much as anybody else. It is essential for us to realize that we inherit chaotic restlessness from others and are often encouraged to pass it on to somebody else. But we can live lives of cultivated calm that actually make contagious another way, a kind of restful presence that can endure even when we are extremely busy and have minimal margin in our lives because of the interwoven demands of home and society.
The Contemplative Outreach session was about Exodus 33:12-15, where God instructs Moses to lead the restless people Israel into the Promised Land. This passage contains the famous promise from God: “My presence will go with you and I will give you rest.” In the Hebrew the word translated as “presence” is literally “face,” which I find more illustrative than “presence.” Being obedient to God’s instruction us enables us to be aware of God’s face. God always sees us and we can always see God. Contemplation helps us do that. Given this realization about hurry, I know some of that opening towards the Face requires being still and slowing down. How can you incorporate stillness into your life and thus become more receptive to the restful presence of God’s face?
This past Monday I got to bring Notes of Rest to my colleagues from Fearless Dialogues, a grassroots organization that creates unique spaces where unlikely partners have hard conversations about taboo subjects. We help our clients tackle tough issues by addressing 5 fears that stifle hard conversation - fear of the unknown, fear of strangers, fear of appearing ignorant, fear of plopping (having others ignore your valued story as if you said nothing), and fear of oppressive systems. So for the Notes of Rest session (where we worked through Deuteronomy 5), one question I asked them was what of the 5 fears keeps you resting? I was amazed by the responses.
One colleague, an immigrant, said that they have a hard time resting for fear of not living up to the brutalizing myth of being a model minority in this country. One person said that they don’t rest for fear of the vulnerability that comes from saying “no” to the requests of people who are not in their inner circle. I shared that I have struggled with the fear of appearing ignorant to others if I were to truly rest. The retreat was liberating for us as we thought about the gift that rest ultimately is for us and for others. That’s my prayer for all of you. Do you see rest as a source of vulnerability? What kind of protection do you need in order to rest?
Thanks for reading, and thank you to everyone who responds to these posts with your thoughts. It’s awesome how this conversation on rest is growing!
abundantly,
Julian
P.S. I’m currently reading Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer in order to learn about the lessons on rest we might glean from plants. If you have other recommendations for books on rest, please send them my way!